Tuesday, January 19, 2010

My Best Foot Forward

We've stirred things up here at the Beatty ranch and the last few weeks have left us spinning-
My big kid started "real school" at a private Christian school that came very highly recommended from one of our closest friends here in OK and it has been a blessing to him in many ways...I cried the first few times I dropped him off and J is still stomping his feet all the way back to the car crying for his "Bubba" to come back home with us. I knew that someday this moment would come and he was ready, Mommy on the other hand wasn't quite so sure about letting her baby go.

Sending your children off and knowing that there is no way you can protect their heart while they are not with you- it's almost more than this Mommy could bear. I prayed for weeks about this decision and even as I walked him in for his first day I was weary.

I counseled him on how to approach his very first day by saying, "Honey, the best thing you can do is to always put your best foot forward."

He looked at me and replied, "is my best foot this one (pointing to his right foot) or this one (pointing to the other)?" I couldn't help but look at my son and want to hug his neck- I laughed out loud and tried to explain what that expression meant to no avail; for now he had me laughing and once you've made Mom laugh, it's over. Now, each day as he departs my hand-help grasp he points to a foot and says, "this one is my best foot today..." he smiles with glee at his joke and walks away with confidence and assurance that today will be a good day at school.

Do I miss homeschooling him? ABSOLUTELY!! Do I miss my kid? His silliness? His antics? YES!! However, he was was the right time to make the switch. I will always hold on to the memories that we made while I watched those "A-HA" moments occur...I am blessed to carry those with me always. I pray he will look back at that time and keep some of those same moments in his heart. He still amazes me everyday with his kindness, with his heart...we were having our daily prayer time while driving him to school one morning and he stops and says,"And thank you GOD for making me your child and help me to stay in your command." I sat there stunned at his depth, his sincerity and the faith exuding out of this little boy and all at once I knew that any doubts I had about school, how we've raised him, where his heart was....all was answered. He is right where God would have him be and we send up praises everyday for this child we have been given.

On the flipside of this decision there is the fact that now I have J all to myself most days. He is an energetic, lively, and silly little boy who's smile could warm a room. His passion for EVERYTHING is amazing and is intense in ways I never thought a 3 year old could conjure up, but he does all with great fervor. His anger and his love, his hugs and his slugs...its always 150% with J. The world "stubborn" doesn't even touch his determination to do things his way, to fight for what's right, to stand in the face of opposition and make his point. He still struggles with his speech delay and the frustration resulting from having to tell someone three or four times his point of view before they can translate what he's trying to communicate. God love his little heart, he is spitfire and spunk wrapped up in too-big-for-him hand-me-downs. He melts my heart with impromptu hugs and "Mommy, I love you so much" or "Mommy you're so pretty!" He knows how to work his Mommy, that is for sure.

The hub keeps plugging along at work and makes so many sacrifices everyday for this family, I am constantly amazed at how much he gives to us. I know there are days when he would rather stay in bed then be at work at 3 am - who wouldn't? But, in his desire to support our family and provide us with the luxuries we enjoy- he keeps on doing what I could not. For that and many other reasons he is our hero!

We have started a new group study at our church and it has been very beneficial to our marriage. Anyone out there that is looking for a transformation in their marriage should look into this study... "The Power of the Praying Wife" and "The Power of the Praying Husband" In just a few short weeks God has used this study and our prayers for each other to rekindle a love for God and for each other that we had lost somewhere along our journey.

I still battle daily with my back injury and the resulting pain; there are days when it gets the better of me and takes me down a road of sadness and despair. Those are the days when my family and friends pray for God to save me from my moments where I forget to let God take my hand and lead me through the pain. I struggle with my faith during my moments of pain that are so intense that I just want to give up...and I am so blessed to have family and friends that see me through those times. Please pray for healing and an end to the pain. Prayer can bring miracles and I would love one of those for me! And for Patrick, John Henry, Alicia and all those out there that keep fighting the good fight.

Truly, in our life, God has continued to graciously bestow upon the Beatty family the blessings of His love and grace through His Word, through the friends he has given to us in life, through each other, through our families. We remain forever in his loving care and pray you do the same.

Blessings abound everywhere you look, just don't be too busy to notice.

Love to all.

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