Sunday, September 27, 2009

Lutheran guilt...

This morning the devil to came to call. It seems as if he has decided to make every Sunday morning his day to come into the house and stir up things like only he can. Today has been no exception. I had all but decided that we were not going to church this morning, but at 9 am while I am still padding around the house in my jammies....the Lutheran guilt took hold of every ounce of sensibility and sent me to get myself ready for church. Much to the chagrin of my oldest son, who had decided that this morning would be much better left to playing the Wii and loafing around in his jammies. I am pretty sure we were under full assault of the devil and his obstacles this morning, but we made, there, take that you sneaky sultan of sin! I say this partly in jest...but seriously, come over to my house on any given Sunday morning and we're shouting, yelling, arguing, and all out just being ugly to each other.

It so happens that I am not the only one, which I found out this morning...I take some comfort in knowing that I am not the only Sunday church-goer that has walked into 'The Lord's House' after spending the morning negotiating with tyrannical toddlers or screaming unkind epithets at my spouse. Not that I relish in other's misery, it just make me feel like I am not alone to know that the devil makes house-calls elsewhere as well. I am so glad that we persevered and got our butts in the pews, even if it meant we walked in grumbling...we left knowing it was God that gave us the strength to battle our foe this morning and still make it to His house to worship and be thankful to Him!

This week has been one of great challenge on various levels, we are cancelling our vacation to the happiest place on Earth and that leaves me quite stricken with sadness. I can't remember at time where I was more disappointed that I didn't get to drive 16 hours to go on vacation. The drive alone would be daunting, but we were so excited to get to go, we just didn't care. Then came the plumber, the bug man and a whopping hospital bill for J's last trip to the ER...and out went the vacation savings we were piling up for our trip. I haven't quite figured out how I will ever make it up to our dear friend Steph that was treating us to tickets or to my boys that both contend that I am horribly "mean," pray for me, please...

I look around at the people here, the world around me, the friend we have in TN who's husband has brain cancer who is not whining and complaining; and I know it is so self-centered and selfish to complain about something as trivial as a missed's all perspective. I hosted myself a pity party on Saturday night while the guys were off enjoying a pancake supper, while ailing from an aching back and whining to the empty room that life wasn't fair, I was reminded that while people are starving in the world, I have a weight problem. While homeless wander the street at night, I have run out of room for our "stuff"; while I am griping that my boys have too much energy, there is some Mom out there that wishes her daughter who is fighting leukemia could have the energy to get out of bed; while there are people in this very town that have nothing and still have a smile of contentedness on their face, here I am in my home with all the comforts I could ask for with an ugly scowl across my face. I was and am still so humbled sometimes and I thank God that he doesn't smite the heck out of me for pouting and waving my fist at the sky for all the things I don't have while ignoring all the things that I DO have!

Apparently, when I re-read my blog here, the devil makes house-calls to my house more often than just Sunday's praying that God continues to bless us in spite of our selfishness, in spite of our unreasonable demands, in spite of our time the devil makes a house-call, I am going to pray BEFORE I open the door. :-) LOL!

Prayers for a great week! Blessings and Love to all.

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